New Year’s resolutions seem to be an important part of our popular culture. Personally, I have a bit of an aversion to them because my sense of what usually happens is that, in the press of our busy lives, we tend to forget those resolutions by around January 15th. I recall a gathering sometime in the last couple of years between Christmas and New Year’s, when the host had us all get in a circle and share what our New Year’s resolutions were for the coming year. While I expressed my cynicism about the concept, I nonetheless played along and we all had a good time listening to one another pledge to lose weight, not yell at the kids so much, drink less, keep the house cleaner, be nicer to a spouse, not spend so damn much time in front of the television and spend more time reading, donate more to charity or do some other good deed, and other admirable goals.
I’m not sure how everybody did or if anyone remembered their noble sentiments a month later, but nonetheless, everybody’s expressed goals were really all about being a better person and there is certainly no harm in expressing those wishes and making some effort in that direction.
A couple of nights later, I met an old friend for coffee and I told him about the gathering. His opinion was different from my slightly skeptical view, and he strongly felt that any pronouncement or effort to be a better person – even if it tends to be forgotten a few weeks later – was worthwhile. He said it was far better to think about positive contributions you can make to the world and ways to better ones’ self than to just be content to stay the same. He said the very exercise of thinking about it was a step in the right direction.
So I asked him what his New Year’s resolutions were and after expressing a couple of things he felt he needed to do to be a better person and a better father particularly he began talking about his business (he happens to be a small business owner just like many of you, although not in the equipment rental business.) He said he starts every new year with a list of 10 ways to improve his business.
“I know I won’t achieve them all,” he said. “But just the exercise of thinking about them gives me some new ideas. And if I try to achieve some of them, I’ll make some improvements. I’ve done it every year and it really works.”
Then he told me some of his recent business resolutions. One was cleaning up all the clutter from his office and the business as a whole. I can really relate to that one because I’m a pack rat with a cluttered desk and shelves. He said that that exercise, begun before January 1, didn’t always last through the year but it set a positive tone for himself. It also made him realize that his tolerance for clutter throughout the business set a precedent for others to do the same, creating an atmosphere where things get lost, where tasks get overlooked, and where customers are affected by the lack of neatness and orderliness.
He also resolved to notice the good work of his employees more often and praise them for worthwhile achievements, and also to avoid criticism, thus creating more positive morale and a better atmosphere. One of the ways he achieved this was if he felt the need to criticize something somebody did, he would wait 24 hours before he mentioned it. This helped ensure he didn’t speak in a frustrated or angry tone and also that he fully considered the employees’ motives for their actions.
“Sometimes I realized they were acting with the best interests of my company in mind, but perhaps they went about it the wrong way,” he said. “I made sure, by waiting before I said anything, that I thanked them for their efforts before correcting what they did.”
He said he didn’t always remember and abide by this goal, but he did remember it often enough throughout the year that his relationships with his employees improved. He resolved to apply the same principles to his relationships at home and that it helped his family life as well. In general, his thoughts and goals for the new year resonated with me and I plan to try some of them.
And my resolution No. 1 will be not to scoff if somebody asks me what my New Year’s resolutions are going to be.